Don't Worry, Jon Gosselin Is Still The World's Most Ridiculous Human

12/28/2013 9:00 AM PST, by
Hey, did you want to spend your day reading about Jon Gosselin and his totally bizarre behaviors and thought processes and his weird, scary feelings about his Kate Gosselin? No? Sorry!

Jon did this brand new interview with Philadelphia magazine, and guys, things aren't looking too great for him. He's not doing terribly with his career or anything, and he's about to be on "Couples Therapy" with our dear Farrah Abraham, so that's amazing, but the way he talks about basically everything ... it's just not good. Here, let's review.

On his "brand," which is apparently focused on his serving job:

“I started to think about my brand. I’m still technically famous. I mean, you’re here. Heh. How can you get people in the door? It’s not the entertainment industry, but it’s the food industry. Cross-branding marketing right there. The main thing the tabloids did was separate me from my brand. My brand was Jon & Kate Plus 8. Now that I’m divorced? My new brand, because of the tabloids, is Jon Gosselin. In 2009, I was on 52 covers. Most-photographed person in 2009.”

On living in the woods like Steve Jobs:

“It’s called: going into the woods. Like, I always look at it like, if you’re in the woods, you take a path out of the woods. It doesn’t work? You come back in the woods, ’cause you’re comfortable. And then you figure out your s--- —out of the woods again. Everyone does it. CEOs lose their jobs, they go back in the woods, they think they hit rock bottom because their lifestyle changed. But in actuality, they go and invent s---. Like Steve Jobs. Or Bill Gates, or, you know what I mean? Recession breeds innovation. So I just start thinking what I can do.” 

He's better than Kate Gosselin because Twitter:

“Yeah, Twitter. I deleted it last year. Best thing I ever did. I can disappear. Nobody knows where I am. She [Kate] tweets everything. To the world, all about my children. I think it’s disgusting and awful. They can’t even have a normal life.” 

The interviewer points out the whole reality show thing that Jon participated in:

“Right. So I made a mistake.”

On Kate:

“Everyone thinks I’m out to get Kate. I don’t give a f---! What would I get out of it? Everyone knows she’s an assh---, you know what I mean? I don’t have to—she’s proven that! Kate wants to still be on television. She’s now digging into the past, because that’s what sells. Too late, honey. No one gives a f---, really.” 

Is he ... Jon Gosselin is starting to get a little bit Kanye on us, isn't he? He compared himself to Steve Jobs, he called himself the "most photographed person in 2009," and he calls everyone else out while congratulating himself. The thing is though that Kanye, regardless of all his wackiness, does have some talent. What does Jon have, besides a massive amount of ridiculousness? Oh, that's it? Huh.
Filed Under:  Jon Gosselin , Interview
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