Quotables: Nick Cannon Really is a Moron of Epic Proportion

4/3/2014 3:30 AM PDT, by Sarah Taylor
"She doesn’t even know who Kim Kardashian is. She doesn’t pay attention to that. ... I thought I was being coy and cunning by naming someone or people that I actually was in a relationship with. The world knew these, these weren’t like names that, you know, I pulled out of a hat – these are people you’ve seen me on red carpets with, engaged, in love and all of that stuff, so wasn’t like it was new information. ... You know sometimes, as my wife says, sometimes I should just keep my big mouth shut."

--Nick Cannon to Howard Stern about his interview with a radio station last week, where he bragged about bedding Kim Kardashian and then, in the same breath, declared just how stellar his sex life with wife Mariah Carey actually happens to be. Sounds to me like somebody's a little butt hurt over the fact that he's not the more famous one in the relationship this time around, huh?

We could go far in depth as to what makes Nick tick, but here's the bottom line: Nick Cannon is a diarrhea-mouthed imbecile who thinks he's raw and cutting-edge and innovative, when all he really is is a loud-mouth who's made a career out of riding the coattails of famous and on-the-rise women. 

I mean, come on -- how many more examples of this guy's obtuseness do we actually need?

Take your wife's advice, Nick: shut the hell up.
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