"She can open my blush, put the brush in and put it on her cheek. Today, she was opening my lipstick. She puts it up to her lips like she know what she's doing!"
--Kim Kardashian describes the mad makeup skills that her little baby daughter, North West, has been developing. North West, who, by the way, is not even two years old yet. Right.
No, this is cute, isn't it? It's not like Kim is forcing her kid to wear makeup, and if North likes to play with it, that's fine. It's nice, even, that they've already got a common interest. But just like there's something kind of weird about Kim putting North in furs, it seems a little odd that she's letting her infant apply her high-end makeup. It's not wrong, it's not scandalous, it's just a little questionable. That's all.
"[I didn't 'fix' my teeth because] it didn't feel like it would fit who I was inside. [Later, a male classmate told me if I fixed my teeth, I could pose for Playboy]. I said, 'Why would I want to be in Playboy?' I just didn't want to look perfect. I didn't want to have to change myself to be attractive. I didn't think that was my responsibility. ... I've had so many of these conversations in my life ... what I look like on film, what I don't look like on film. What are we supposed to look like? Men are not having these conversations."
--Patricia Arquette, kicking it with her awesome and empowering attitude, and yes -- why in hell would you want to objectify yourself (and have to "fix" things in the process in order to do so) when you can just be yourself and bust up assumptions that just because you're attractive, you probably want to pose naked and make money off of your lady parts?
Don't get us wrong: there's nothing wrong with a woman choosing to pose nude ... but there's much wrong with the idea that every hot woman should want to pose nude just because they're hot.
Get it straight, y'all.
This is Kim Zolciak of "Real Housewives" fame, and, as you can probably tell, she's got an abnormally tiny waist thanks to one of those infernal waist trainers. We've seen them on so many Kardashians, and now the trend seems to be spreading to other reality stars. Before we know it, every lady in the land will have one of these things strapped on, forcing their internal organs to rearrange themselves so that they can have a body shape that no human could naturally possess -- a shape that society has told them is attractive.
Is it worth it? If you're unsure, maybe just ask Kim's organs there. They've probably got an opinion or two on the topic.
A lot of people have been outraged by what Kid Rock said about Beyonce recently, but really, there's something much more pressing and infinitely more horrible that you should be outraged by when it comes to Kid Rock, and that is everything. Everything about this man is just plain awful, and this tragic story we're about to hear about some poor hogs and Kid Rock's deranged attitude is just going to drive it straight on home.
What happened was an interviewer from Rolling Stone went to Kid Rock's home in Alabama and learned that some wild hogs had been damaging his property. He had caught three hogs in a cage prior to the interviewer's arrival, and he planned on killing them. And that's one thing: it's legal, and if he had planned to humanely kill them and then use them for food, that might be acceptable. But it's Kid Rock we're talking about here, and what actually happened is that he showed off the caged animals and announced that "We're about to do some murderous s---."
He, along with his girlfriend, goes on to shoot the hogs with a small variety of guns. He watches as one "collapses and writhes" after being shot because, as he so eloquently puts it, "His ass is done." After all three hogs are dead, his girlfriend remarks that one of them was pretty, he says, "with a chuckle," that she's "pretty dead."
Look, this is just the absolute worst. It's disturbing, and not disturbing in a dramatic way, like "Wow, it's disturbing how adorable Taylor Swift is," it's disturbing in a very, very real way. So with that, along with all of the Beyonce stuff -- not to mention the fact that he seriously referred to the president as "Obummer" later in this interview -- can we just be done with this guy now?
Here's Brandi-So Hot at 42 It's Not Even Funny-Glanville during a photoshoot on the beach, and let's be honest: this has probably begun to grind on LeAnn Rimes' last nerve even before she's seen the shoot, and you wanna know why? Because while Brandi's getting paid to take off her clothes on the beach, LeAnn might only be seeing concert advances that she's gotta pay back in a few months due to the fact that she hardly ever shows to perform.
It burns, huh?
"I know PETA has asked the Kardashians to stop. [North West] isn't an accessory. She shouldn't be wearing ugly couture clothes. ... Fur makes me physically sick, and wearing it is a very dated way of showing everyone how rich you are."
--Sharon Osbourne to Kim Kardashian on North West ... and though that sounds an awful lot like driving directions, it's not -- it's how Kim's been most recently slammed.
It's no secret that Sharon's anti-fur -- just as it's no secret that Kim K loves it. But while we're not here to debate the ethics of fur-wearing (it's pretty gross, plain and simple), we're going to give a nod to Sharon's statements on Kim dressing up North like she's some kind of collector's doll.
That's bad enough -- but when you mix fur, haute couture, and bulletproof vests? You're treading into tacky waters, friends ... and no amount of hobnobbing with Anna Wintour's gonna change that.
"If I did have a penis, I'd stick it at the back of your throat."
All right, so that sweet little sentiment up there? That's a thing that Iggy Azalea said. She said, to her "haters," that if she did have a penis as a certain strange rumor stated, she would stick it at the back of your throat. Get it? If someone had some not so positive things to say about her, then she would silence that person by aggressively placing a sexual organ in that person's mouth. That is a thought that Iggy Azalea formed in her mind and then saw fit to express to the media.
So yeah, Iggy ... this isn't working out. We just can't support you if you're going to be this creepy and gross and wrong. Sorry, girl, but we're even more sorry that you think this way.
We didn't really expect the Duggar family to issue an apology for that horrifically sad video we saw yesterday of Jill Duggar's husband, Derick Dillard, trying to hit a cat with a sled. They're not that great at saying sorry for all the awful things they do, so why would they feel bad about being mean to a poor little animal? But while we didn't expect an apology, we also didn't expect this nonsense.
To be clear "this nonsense" is this photo that Jill posted of herself all cuddled up with Derick, a photo of her "out on a date with my sweet hubby." Her sweet hubby, guys. Not her cruel hubby, not her hateful hubby, not her despicable hubby. All of those would be more accurate in light of that video, but no, she's going to go with "sweet." We really didn't need any additional Duggar sadness today, but it's OK, Jill went ahead and brought it anyway.
Maybe just take a break, entire Duggar family. Take a break from social media and reality television and maybe just public in general. Because if you thought that hitting a cat was a good idea, and that filming it was a good idea, and that posting the video and then undoubtedly hearing all the backlash and ultimately refusing to apologize was a good idea, then there's probably nothing else to be done here.