3/26/2015 7:00 AM PDT
Oh, friends, do you remember what it was like to be 17? Working some part-time job, getting ready for prom, hanging out with your friends after school, actually, you know, going to school ... such fond memories, right? Unfortunately, the experiences many of us have had at this special, tender age are not the experiences that Kylie Jenner is having right now. No, instead of going to school, Kylie is showering for literal hours. No, really:

“I love pampering days. I usually take a shower or bath for about two hours and scrub my whole body. I love lotions – whole yogurt lotions are amazing – and masks. And I put coconut oil in my hair.” 

She's also, like, super concerned about her health declining, you know, since she's practically a senior citizen already:

"I have not worked out a day in my life in two years, it's really bad. I am going to start this month just for health reasons. I feel like all the food I eat is catching up with me as I get older."

Yeah, she's pretty much a grownup:

"I'm about to turn 18, so I'm starting to do more of my own stuff, like acting and other stuff I'm interested in. Kendall hangs out with my family a lot, I hang out with my friends a lot. My family always jokes that I'm always off doing my own thing and they never know where I am." 

If this is what Kylie's life is like while she's still legally a child, then heaven help us come her 18th birthday, y'all.

Filed Under:  Kylie Jenner , Interview
3/23/2015 3:00 PM PDT
Lately, it seems like Kylie Jenner is just a little desperate to grow up. She just bought her very first house at the ripe old age of 17, not to mention all the racy fashions. But in many, many ways, she's still just a child. For instance, read this thing that she said about fashion, and let the self-important teenager-y vibes wash right over you:

"I never encouraged people to line their lips or wear lip liner, but I like it. It was wild—and the blue hair was pretty big, too. Honestly, I feel if I had never chopped my hair off or dyed it blue and it was still the same three years ago, then there wouldn't be that much hype. There are so many girls that I see wearing blue hair. I saw this girl at a carnival and it was like super casual—'Hey, can I get a picture'—and her nails were exactly how mine were the week before, the design and everything. But it's crazy because I don't realize how many people like the things that I do."

Did you get that, everyone? Kylie Jenner basically started lip liner, blue hair, and manicures. If you rock, or, you know, attempt to rock any of those things, then you have Kylie to think. Sure, you might have had blue hair before Kylie did -- some people might have even had blue hair before Kylie was born -- but Kylie's the one who really defined it. If it wasn't for her, there probably wouldn't be any hype.

Sorry about that headache you surely just got from rolling your eyes so hard, but it was worth it, right?

Filed Under:  Kylie Jenner , Interview
3/23/2015 4:00 AM PDT

In a normal world, it'd be unheard of for a 17-year-old to be buying a house, let alone hearing her agonize over which chandeliers are appropriate for her living room and how excited she is over opening her new mattresses. This isn't a normal world, however; it's a Kylie Jenner world, and nothing in it is like anything you've probably ever known. 

See, one might think that Kylie would be learning formative life lessons during this time of her life, and learning that good things come to those who wait. And who've earned it. But if Kylie's ever learned anything, it's that she doesn't have to wait for anything, and as for earning it ... well, that's up to you to decide whether or not she has. 

The scariest thing of all is that there are so many young, impressionable girls who look up to Kylie, and even though buying a house -- or having a house purchased on your behalf -- seems like an innocent thing, it's really not. Not to those teenagers who live in the real world, anyway. 

Filed Under:  Kylie Jenner , hot photos , Photos
3/19/2015 5:00 AM PDT
Can we start an official countdown to Kylie Jenner's 18th birthday? Not for scary creepy reasons, but so that we can look forward to the day that we no longer have to feel quite so sad about all the questionable choices this girl makes. For instance, she posted these photos last night showing off "the basic workout attire." Because doesn't everyone wear gold bracelets and cages around their midsections and hair extensions and push-up bras while working out?

No. The answer to everything involved in this whole entire thing is just "no."

Filed Under:  Kylie Jenner , Photos
3/18/2015 3:00 PM PDT
Yesterday, just in case you missed this in all of your St. Patrick's Day shenanigans, was Rob Kardashian's 28th birthday. It seems like Rob has had kind of a rough time lately, but don't you worry for one second, because his whole family was there to publicly shower him with birthday love. Seriously, this is some crazy sweetness right here.

Here's Kris Jenner's message to Rob:

Your smile can light up any room and a million hearts @robkardashian ..I fell madly in love with you the moment we met 28 years ago...you are such a joy, with the biggest heart I have ever known. God blessed me with an amazing son and I cherish every single day and memory we have...you have experienced great sadness, overcome adversity and also enjoyed success beyond measure...but the best is yet to come. I love you angel boy. I'm so proud of you. You are a kind delicious human being who cares deeply for others. Stay close to God and your family always...I wish you a very happy birthday Robbo! I wish for you joy, peace in your heart, health, happiness, and the sound of your beautiful laughter...you are a huge part of my heart and I love you. Mommy

And Kendall Jenner's:

happy birthday to my incredibly silly, wildly handsome big brother!!! @robkardashian YOU ARE MY FAVORITE PERSON...ever! this guy is responsible for all the belly laughs I've had throughout my entire life. all the love in the world for this man.

And Kourtney Kardashian's:

Happy happy birthday to one of my best friends in the entire world who makes me laugh like no one else. Roberto, you have a heart of gold and a sweetness that is infectious. You are one of a kind. Happy birthday Rob Dawgy Dizzle.

And Khloe Kardashian's:

Happy birthday @robkardashian!!!!!! Never will I ever meet another man as great as you! I know this is the year where you will find your happiness again! I will be right by your side, holding your hand, every step of the way!!! I adore you my one and only brother!! Happy Happy Happy birthday!!

Kim Kardashian and Kylie Jenner gave him birthday wishes as well, but one can only handle so much love and sweetness. And man, this sure is a lot, isn't it?
If there's one thing this family can do right, it's family, and is anyone else tearing up right now?

3/16/2015 1:00 PM PDT
Here she is, everyone: Kylie Jenner at some event wearing yet another piece of see-through clothing. She's a minor, she's not concerned about modesty. And that's fine. That's the way it's going to be. She's going to be allowed to do things like this, and that is the world we live in. It's time to come to peace with this, sad and weird and uncomfortable as it may be. It's time.

Verdict: leave it. But obviously it doesn't matter what we think, so why even bother?

Finally, check her out from another angle -- what a malfunction, right? And no, we're not talking about those God-awful fingernails, either. 


3/10/2015 5:00 AM PDT
We always thought that French Montana seemed like a giant creeper when he was creeping all over Khloe Kardashian, but little did we know, we hadn't even begun to see the full extent of his sketchiness. Because that is something that we are (hopefully) seeing now. Right here in this photo. This photo of French cozied up with that scandalous Kylie Jenner.

We're certainly not saying there's anything going on between these two -- French has been hanging out with Khloe again, sadly, and Kylie did caption this photo "big bro for real" -- but still, it's not a cute picture. It makes us feel bad on the inside, and afraid and grossed out and a high number of other negative feelings. There are just some things in this world that should never happen, and this, unfortunately, is one of them.

Filed Under:  Kylie Jenner , French Montana , Photos