Granny Just Blew Everyone Away
Welcome to your nightmare, ladies and gentlemen -- you know it well. It's the one where you're sitting in front of the television, watching trashy reality shows and stuffing your face with trans fats and fizzy drinks, only to roll out from under the greasy TV tray to check email ... and accidentally seeing this picture of Kris Jenner lounging by the pool like she's 22 years old and not even at all close to her real age -- which is 58. So sorry you had to see that, friends. All of the sorries.
And so sorry about the rest, too. Happy hump day or whatever. Go back to bed and try again.