Oh, Good: Miley Cyrus is Free to Twerk All Over Your Junk Now

1/16/2014 2:00 PM PST, by Sarah Taylor
Dust off your hankies and blow the old, crusty boogies out of them or whatever, because Miley Cyrus' alleged relationship with Kellan Lutz is allegedly over. Those are a lot of allegations, but imagine how much alleged sex these two probably had in the short weeks of each other's company -- because that puts both your boogies and your allegations to shame. 

A source close to the two confirms that the two just aren't into it all that much anymore, and though there was "definitely" a "fling," and it was definitely "fun," it's also definitely over. 

In light of this new development (?), now who should Miley fling with next? Our hopes are for somebody real random ... like, I don't know, Michael Bolton. That'd work for a little while. 

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866 days ago

There was no relationship. Just publicity whipped up by one or both of their PR teams. Since Hercules didn't do that great at the box office, Kellan no longer needs to be maybe romantically involved with the Hillbilly Ho. They would have made a crappy couple anyways.

866 days ago

Are you sure they ever really dated? I hear she's a lesbian and is starting to date The Bieb. That was her Molly the police found in The Bieb's house even.

866 days ago

Isn't her career about over, that's why she doing the most to stay relevant, but epic fail.

Isaac Newton
866 days ago

She can twerk all over my junk anytime she wants.

866 days ago

Yeeesh..... I wouldn't let the confused baby dyke twerk me for anything!

866 days ago

HA! She has become that fat girl in school who all the guys fuck but no one want to admit fucking.

Tasha Jones
866 days ago

I would love to twerk my junk all over him any day #yummy