Tori Spelling Remains So Very, Very Desperate

7/17/2014 10:30 AM PDT, by
We as a people have never witnessed anything so awkward and terrible and yes, desperate, as that awful reality show featuring the crumbling marriage of Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott.

And that's saying a whole lot, considering that we've known the existence of people like Lady Gaga and LeAnn Rimes. But there was something so special about that "True Tori" mess, wasn't there? It was something about the way that Tori and Dean allowed the most sensitive, traumatic issues of their family to be broadcasted to thousands and thousands of people. Yeah, that was probably it.

But Tori, in all of her attention-seeking ridiculousness, is not ready to stop talking about her private affairs, and that's why she's telling the world how her marriage is going these days:

"We're definitely committed to being a family. We're working on things. It's a work in progress, but family comes first and we're definitely working on it, and things are better."

But are they still doing all that intense therapy?

"For sure."

See? They're still going to therapy! They still have issues to discuss! So won't someone please give them another reality show? Won't you reach down deep into your soul and find the kindness to keep asking her about her gross husband and his malignantly meandering penis? And then film it? Or hey, if you can't do anything else, just say her name. She's like Bloody Mary, but instead of saying her name and getting murdered, you can say her name and give her validation and self esteem and hopefully some money. Think about it!

Filed Under:  Interview

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684 days ago

Dean looks like Harry from Harry and the Hendersons

684 days ago

Soooo where is the part that is "nearly embarrassing"? Another stupid,pointless article from Fish Wrapper!

684 days ago

The point of her article is to ridicule Tori and her gross husband.

684 days ago

This was a hilarious article. You're actually 100% right about everything.

684 days ago both deserve each other

684 days ago

Why are you so angry with her? Did she snub you on an interview?

684 days ago

Wow Emily, you really have some issues. Are you jealous that she's in the limelight and you're not? Definitely not liking Tori and Dean, but like you and your continuous crap more. Sweetie, a journalistic career requires people that can actually write/report. Go back to shining Harvey's shoes.